More Tales to Give you Goosebumps: The Cat's Tale

We open the newly de-titled short story section with yet another Goosebumps story about animals. I'm getting sick of this now. Marla and her family have moved out of New York city to the countryside, and she's extremely unhappy. Despite the fact that they moved here a year ago. Maybe she's secretly unhappy that the move from the big city to the countryside isn't at all like Hot Fuzz. One stormy night (what other kind is there?), Mum, Dad, and Marla's annoyingly similar to the past 12 siblings I've had to put up with younger brother. Suddenly, a large furry object jumps through thew window and grabs Marla. Ah, Cousin Itt! You are just in time for dinner! Actually, it's a stray cat, who somehow climbed up a tree and leapt through the window like an Olympic-long jumper. Like most cats. Marla pleads with her parents to keep the cat which just attempted to murder her (this ain't gonna be the last time, either), and they cave in. Marla names the cat Misty, because it's misty outside (Armitage from Ratburger had a better naming process than this), and the presumably disease/flea ridden cat goes to sleep at the foot of Marla's bed.

The following morning, Misty gets in the shower with Marla-wait what. This is supposed to be charming, I think. American Beauty was more charming than this. Mum reveals that she's joined a swimming club, and that somehow means that Marla and Scott (oh yeah, he's in this story) can go to the local pool whenever they fancy. And Marla's still annoyed by the whole 'moving away' thing. Misty looks a bit upset at the fact that Marla's leaving, presumably because she's now unable to live without anyone looking after her for more than 5 minutes now. She learns fast. So, Marla stays at home and cuddles Misty.
That night, Marla has a dream sequence. Great, I haven't had one of those in a while. In it, she's back in New York (get over it!), on a boat, having a picnic. As 11 year olds do. Suddenly, some random bloke, in the middle of the lake or something, grabs her from behind and starts suffocating her. She wakes up, and she's still being suffocated: by Misty. She rips the cat off of her, as Mum and Dad rush in. Despite the fact that Misty isn't a headmaster, the parents still blindly defend her actions.

The next day, Maral leaves Misty at home (fair, I suppose) and goes to the pool. As she gets to the high-dive, she suddenly feels afraid of the water, and decides to come back down. I should point out that the development of obvious cat-like attributes is the only thing that's done well in this story, as it fits in well with the pacing. Suddenly, she realises that there's something up there with her (wait your turn!)... before she feels a pain in her leg and plummets into the water, before quickly losing conciousness.The lifeguard saves her, though the way it's written, it's like she was saved and given CPR in the span of 4 seconds.

Marla realises that Misty's attempting to steal her body. Oh no, not again! So, she takes Misty off to the animal shelter, which are common in the middle of the countryside. But the cat came back the very next half-hour, and when Marla gets back, Misty's there on the doorstep. So, Marla takes Misty to the bus station, in an attempt to send Misty halfway across the country, to be adopted by some other poor sod. However, Misty escapes from her cat carrier (why is anyone surprised?).... and gets hit by a bus. Mwa mwa mwawawaw.

That night, Misty thinks she's safe at last... until she hears Misty chanting in her room. Turns out she's still got 8 lives left. Of course she does. Run for your lives; no couch is safe!

The Cat's Tale is your typical short story: unscary, unintelligent, and with nothing of value for anyone. Unless, say, your first reaction at the sight of a cat is to wet yourself and move to another planet, screaming all the way from the estate agents. Yeah, yeah, yeah, don't read it. Can I go home now? My tea's in the oven.

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